July 09, 2006 - 11:26 PM.

Goddamn bullriding pregnant ladies!

OK, I can finally articulate why those horrible ads with the pregnant woman riding a mechanical bull irritate me so goddamn much.

To remind myself years from now what I was talking about -- these are the ads that show pregnant women doing foolish and dangerous things, and then say that not nursing your child is just as dangerous.

First off, I hate them because they're just tacky and ham-handed. If you can't be subtle, at least for fuck sake be gracious. (You see what I mean.)

Secondly, I hate them because, despite what well-meaning lactivists and really ballsy gals like Julie/alittlepregnant might say, it is not easy for most women who really can't nurse to feel they are not being targeted by these ads. The creators and supporters say, some avidly and some reluctantly, "Hey! If you've got no *reason* to feel guilty, then this ad isn't aimed at you & you don't have to worry about our disapproval anyway! So what're ya whinin' about?" Trouble is, there is no woman in America who doesn't know that nursing is the current "in" thing, but most women don't simultaneously have good enough information to know whether any troubles they're having are normal or cause for supplementation. The typical woman is confronted with so little support and such wide discrepancies even in the official info, that it is unfair to ask her to place herself accurately on the continuum of guilt offered by this ad campaign.

But the third and strongest reason I hate this fucking ad campaign, is that it is VIOLENT. The very people it aims to help -- newborn babies -- are subjected to their vulnerable mothers being assaulted by guilt, accusations, and crazy-making feelings of inadequacy and frustration. As with so many public health campaigns, this one is warlike (campaign, target, aim). The people with the message are frustrated that their constituents are not behaving as public health policymakers dictate that they should, so attacks are devised upon these poor ignorant slobs. "Without our attacks to stop you, you would KILL YOUR BABY!" scream these unconscionable ads. "You're nothing but a woman. Don't blame lack of extended family, or a history of sexual abuse, or crushing societal breast-preservation pressure. You had better whip them out! And you had better feed that baby! DO WHAT THE FUCKING DOCTOR TELLS YOOOOOOOOOOUU!"

Yeah, that's how you can tell that mainstream medicine has co-opted another hippie practice. They hated breastfeeding until it seemed like every gal wanted to give it a try again, and now they're putting their inimitable stamp on its "promotion." Sure. Telling an expectant mother that she is one step away from killing her kid, that a bottle of formula is as good as stopping on the train tracks, is the lovely gentle persuasion she deserves at this special time. Why don't you just convince her that a single glass of wine during pregnancy will make her a doomsday merchant of birth defects?

Oh wait, they already did that one.

Those people ought to be ashamed of themselves.

I think it is worth noting that my child did not touch a drop of solid food for many months, that his main nutrition still came from milk all the way through about month nine, and that I still nurse him whenever he wants it, day or night, no matter where we are, at 19 months. And that not a move has been made to wean him, including his not having had a bottle for probably a year (having had a total of perhaps 2 dozen of them) and his never spending a night away from us. Even I, crazy milk-lady, have heard that one about catch more flies with honey . . .

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